Posted on 30 Jun 2024 by Jan Tie
Did you know that our church has a growth group specifically for mothers?
At Mums Growth Group (GG), the women are mostly mothers of young children; some are new mothers, some have multiple kids, but all are still in the early years of childhood. Their children are but babies, preschool toddlers, kindergarteners or early primary schoolers at best. These are arguably the toughest years of a mother’s life and at the same time a seemingly insignificant fraction of her children’s life. Yet they are probably the most important and foundational years for her children. That’s why they are often called the formative years. And that’s why Mums GG exists – to provide the support a young mother could use, and of course, an opportunity to continue learning while leaving the kids at home with dad or grandma for the night while she meets with the group to read the Bible, reflect and grow together. Of course, the occasional mother with older children joins us too depending on circumstances, but that’s beside the point.
In the 3 years I’ve been in Mums GG, we’ve consistently had a yearly retreat – a short getaway to spend time fellowshipping, and bonding, and encouraging one another. This year’s Mums GG retreat (see group photo below) was just one night away from home, and a brief morning together at a nearby Airbnb in Petaling Jaya. Although the retreat was short (neither was it short on babies – which meant multitasking for some of our ladies, as usual), the time was spent getting to know each other better, doing our GG study for the week, and encouraging one another to persevere in the faith and strive to be godly mothers as our GG leader Joy Gan shared her reflections from Hebrews 10.
As I reflect upon motherhood as a mom of two beautiful kids, I am learning to appreciate God’s Fatherhood even more. His patience and lovingkindness toward undeserving sinful people who do not give Him the worship He is due is mindblowing and humbling. The way He teaches His people how to live according to His Word, instructs them and disciplines them so that they can learn to be the people they should be. Parenting is not easy, and I am thankful that God has shown us what it should look like.
Motherhood changes you. It changes everything you ever were, into something you never thought you could be – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Motherhood exposes our sins of selfishness, a lack of love, anger, and a lack of self-control, especially in the most high-pressure situations. Think high-energy toddlers, temper tantrums and meltdowns, constant sibling fights to break up, instructions that seem to fall on little deaf ears, unmet expectations, the unending daily housework and cooking; and the list goes on.
And yet, this exposure of the sinful heart of a mother is for her sanctification. It brings her to her knees and teaches her full dependence on her heavenly Father. At the same time, through it all, it shows not just her children and her husband all the good work Christ is doing in her heart, but the church, and the world. Her godliness, resilience, strength, wisdom, faithfulness, servant-heartedness, goodness and kindness; her nurturing of those under her care spread the fragrance of Christ and all that He is. It is how God makes her more like her Lord and Saviour.
This gift of motherhood is one that God bestows upon every woman, according to His good design. But you don’t have to have actual kids to be a mother. Whether you are a spiritual or biological mother, when you seek to nurture, care for, and love a younger person for their own sake, for God’s sake, rather than your own, you are mothering. The nature of women as designed by God is one capable of a nurturing ability beyond their imaginations.
Children are not born innocent (Ps 51:5); you don’t have to teach them to lie. The very nature of Genesis 3 is exhibited early on in a toddler. And it is precisely in these formative years when they need to begin to learn all that is true, good, and beautiful, by way of instruction and discipline. This discipline includes being corrected in their speech and behaviour when necessary; and instruction includes teaching them the ways of the Lord – the gospel and all the godly virtues and habits that should flow out of it. Surely, this carries on all throughout their childhood and teenage years, and the challenges will vary, but it must start in the early years.
The task of motherhood may seem monumental and daunting, but our strength does not come from ourselves, but from our Lord. The hope for every young mother out there, struggling with the daily challenges of motherhood, is that God will continue to teach, strengthen and equip you with all that you need to do your task well. Our role is to be faithful in all things, whether it is in preparing a kid’s snack, taking out the trash, or reading to our children, and taking the time to teach them the truths of the gospel, and modelling Christ at home.
Dear exhausted, struggling mother, know that you are called to image God in the very task you may find impossible, and draw strength from the scriptures. Do not stop meeting with your fellow brothers and sisters to remind each other of the grace we have all been given to live lives worthy of our King. And continue to pray for your children, that they may grow up to be men and women who are rooted and grounded in the gospel, fearing God and loving Him and His church, all their days, for we are raising the future generation of the church.
If you are a young mother in need of a community that seeks to grow in the Word together, don’t hesitate to reach out to us. Mums GG welcomes you. You may contact Joy Gan at 013-325 3093.
